Wednesday, January 26, 2011

21 Years in the Making!

Apparently my blogging habits take after my journal writing habits. In my case, that means only writing when:
a) Something significant happens
b) I'm really happy about something
c) I'm really upset about something

21st birthday has earned its placement some where between the lines of a/b. In honor of this day, I'm following Taylor Swifts advice to "Speak Now". If you're confused, go read the cover letter of her newest album, then come back. (really though!) I only wish I was as brave as Taylor, but since I'm not, let me just say thank you for singing what feels like every emotion I have felt since 16, and saying everything in a song I wish I could say to people's faces:

The Story of Us: the whole thing. Dear John: word for word, let's just say, been there done that. Never Grow Up: for my brothers. Innocent: turns out not every song is directed towards a boy. Speak Now: newest inspiration for 2011. Love Story: pure joy. A Place in this World: 21. Other Side of the Door: if only men could read women's minds.

The list goes on and on. I think part of the reason I love music so much is because it can say things I'm feeling more clearly than I could ever possibly put into words.

So what's this year going to be like? Only time will tell. As someone once said to me, "all in due time." All I can say is out with the old and in with the new...whatever that means!

21 Things that took me 21 years to learn:

1. People don't read minds. Say what you mean and mean what you say.
2. In long run, the only person who gets hurt when pretending not to care about something you really care about is you. It's ok to care, and it's ok to show it.
3. The best way to study is to read with a question in mind. Memorizing last minute only gets you so far. (Yes, it took me 21 years...)
4. Everything happens for a reason. Don't freak out, everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end.
5. Time flies the older you get-come what may and love it.
6. You can exercise all you want, but you lose weight when you stop eating...hahaha
7. It is not requisite that man run faster than he hath strength. Know your limits.
8. Being a nice, good person doesn't mean you actually have to like everyone, much less be BFFS with everyone.
9. But be nice. You'll never have to regret being too kind.
10. Sometimes being mature and choosing the right sucks. Do it anyway.
11. Old school: Empathy. Treat others how you would want to be treated if you were in their shoes. Remember what it feels like to have your feelings hurt.
12. Have fun and lighten up! Life is to be enjoyed, not endured.
13. There's something about dancing that frees the inner you. If you think that sounds cheesy (cuz it does), just try it.
14. Do things you think you don't feel like doing. Nine times out of ten you'll be glad you did it.
15. Surround yourself with people who charge your batteries, not drain them.
16. ALL things in moderation. Boys, food, friends, exercise, shopping, fb, you get the picture.
17. You find out who your real friends are when they get married, and even more so when they have kids ;) hahaha
18. Sometimes you have to quit trying to make a plan and just go with the flow...that's usually when it all falls into place.
19. Don't judge. "Some of the greatest battles will be fought within the silent chambers of your own soul." In other words, you never really know what someone else has/is going through. Even someone who seems like they've got it all.
20. Do things that are hard to do.
21. Follow your own advice, and dont ask others to do things you arent willing to do yourself.

What I'm trying to say is...
Speak now or forever hold your peace, ’the words said by preachers at the end of wedding ceremonies all over the world, right before the vows. It’s a last chance for protest, a moment that makes everyone’s heart race, and a moment I’ve always been strangely fascinated by. So many fantasize about bursting into a church, saying what they’d kept inside for years like in the movies. In real life, it rarely happens. Real life is a funny thing, you know. In real life, saying the right thing at the right moment is beyond crucial. So crucial, in fact, that most of us start to hesitate, for fear of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. But lately what I’ve begun to fear more than that is letting the moment pass without saying anything. I think most of us fear reaching the end of our life, and looking back regretting the moments we didn’t speak up. When we didn’t say ‘I love you. ’ When we should’ve said ‘I’m sorry. ’ When we didn’t stand up for ourselves or someone who needed help. Words can break someone into a million pieces, but they can also put them back together. I hope you use yours for good, because the only words you’ll regret more than the ones left unsaid are the ones you use to intentionally hurt someone. What you say might be too much for some people. Maybe it will come out all wrong and you’ll stutter and you’ll walk away embarrassed, wincing as you play it all back in your head. But I think the words you stop yourself from saying are the ones that will haunt you the longest. So say it to them. Or say it to yourself in the mirror. Say it in a letter you’ll never send or in a book millions might read someday. I think you deserve to look back on your life without a chorus of resounding voices saying I could’ve, but it’s too late now. There is a time for silence. There is a time waiting your turn. But if you know how you feel, and you so clearly know what you need to say, you’ll know it. I don’t think you should wait. I think you should speak now.